The Palace Commissions New Portrait Of Spivey

STUNNED art critics last night slammed the first official portrait of Spivey — claiming he looks 51 and has “Kate Middleton’s nose”.

The oil painting — by “Southend Rap Artist” Stacey Eminem — was unveiled at Essex’s National Portrait Gallery yesterday and immediately branded “shockingly poor”.

It shows Spivey, with  hair, wrinkles and bags under his eyes — making him appear two decades older than he really is.

A spokesman for the Palace said “You get what you pay for luv. One thinks it is rather striking”

Spivey was quoted as saying “Don’t waste my fxxxxxg time you nonce”

You can visit Spivey’s site here to get his unique take on the good and the great.

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4 thoughts on “The Palace Commissions New Portrait Of Spivey

  1. Pingback: Chris Spivey » Blog Archive » The Palace Commissions New Portrait Of Spivey

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